Editor I Need Some Help Here by Don Matthews

A black and white image of a raised hand being held at the arm by other hands
Image Source: Snappa

I’m wanting some help with my poetry
I need to unburden my brain
It’s giving me mental thrombosis
Imagine the state of my pain

 
Have you had a mind-clot of neurons
Who want to stop whirring around?
I rely on their whirring-aroundness
To tell me they’re perfectly sound

 
I think I’m expecting too much of
My neurons I want to rotate
I should let them do what they want to
And observe, then consider. Then dictate

 
So what do I mean ‘lots of help here’?
Am I on the right track with this poem?
Do I need to refine how I wrote it?
It’s an idea that I’d like to see grown.

Don’t take my draft as an end-product
A poet’s domain sacrosanct
I’m willing to learn and verse better
Until my poem’s finally franked

-DON MATTHEWS

Don is an Australian writer who focuses on humour.  He runs the ‘Flippant, Comic, and Serious’ website.

Don Matthews Author picture
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7 Comments Add yours

  1. Terveen Gill says:

    Don, If you ask me, this poem is as right as it can be. And those neurons have a problem of non-stop whirring, but that’s the beauty of creativity. It’s good to have a second and third opinion, so make sure that editor is on the right track. You don’t want to end up with a poem that looks and sounds like a piece of crap. Haha. Don’t blame me for trying to rhyme…
    Congratulations Don!

    Like

  2. Jeff Flesch says:

    Always such a pleasure to read your poems, Don. I second, Terveen’s opinion, neurons, whir away…creativity unleashed. Ha!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I wrote this a while ago and am now looking at it as an outside observer. I pick up several messages here

    I should let them do what they want to
    And observe, then consider. Then dictate

    Let the mind go free and do it’s own thing. Then consider what it comes back with. Finally dictate/decide what to do with it.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oops, pressed enter too early.

    Don’t take my draft as an end-product
    A poet’s domain sacrosanct

    A writer often tends to want to defend what they’ve done (despite having asked for help). The lines say this draft of mine is not sacrosanct. Offer suggestions for improvement. That’s what I’ve asked of you

    Liked by 1 person

  5. jonicaggiano says:

    This is not only very cleaver but hilarious. I feel this way about my poetry often, not sure it is finished, keep sorting it and changing it around. So I can relate to your piece but I also think it is truly funny and a lot of us can likely relate. Congratulations Don, Hugs, Joni

    Liked by 1 person

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