Find yourself standing back and questioning your whole existence by Bogdan Dragos

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He liked her story

Her body not

that much, but that mattered

so little

in comparison with

her story

She told him that

it was a teenage pregnancy

that pushed her

into prostitution. Definitely

not an uncommon

case.

She had to quit school

because

her parents would

no longer pay for

tuition. They disowned

her and kicked

her out. She gave birth

in a bathroom stall,

her first intention being

to kill the baby

“But, you know,” she’d said,

“it’s true what

they say about

motherly instinct. You get

it the moment you

hold your child in your

hands. All those people who

get on your nerves

urging you to

have kids

because you’ll love them

after you have them

do make sense now. There

is a grain

of truth there. I

couldn’t do it anymore.

I wanted to chop the thing

to pieces small enough

to be flushed down

the toilet.

But all I did in the

end was call for an

ambulance and

we were both taken to

the hospital. Call it magic,

call it what you

will, but I fell in love with that

child. It’s a boy.

Instantly, I pictured our

life together. It was

a kind of madness

of the moment, I don’t know

how to explain it. But I saw

all my world in

that child. I knew that he

would become my

everything.

I would need no family,

not even lovers in my life. He

would replace all of that.

So I was quite

happy for some days. But you

know, as time

went on, I… kinda came back

to my senses.

It’s kinda like when you

masturbate to some

nasty porn and

then

find yourself standing back

and questioning your

whole existence.

Reality hit me

hard back then

and now… Well, I do visit

my kid in the

foster home. I do check out

on him. I… I also save

money…”

It was a good

story

He asked her

the child’s name

and hers

before he strangled her

to death in the

back of the car

She definitely had

a better story

than the previous one

It excited him

And every time he returned

to the place he buried her

in a body bag

and dug her up

and made love to

her cold flesh

he relived the story. He fantasized

that he was her new

lover who

proposed to her

and took her out of prostitution

and together they

went to the

foster home

and took her child out

to live with them

It was a very

wholesome

fantasy

And tonight he would

have it

again

He bought condoms

from the gas station,

got into

his car

and started driving

towards

her again

excitement already

blooming in

his pants

-BOGDAN DRAGOS

Bogdan Dragos supervises casinos for a gambling company, working twelve-hour shifts locked in a dark office full of TV monitors. There he mostly daydreams and writes poems and stories. He also manages a poetry blog Daydreaming as a profession.

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